Thursday, October 29, 2020

Two Guys Talking






I don't mind if your sister works at the topless club. In fact, I'd like to meet her.

So Long, Buckaroo

Well, for goodness' sake, Jerry Jeff Walker died. So did Billy Joe Shaver and a week ago, Eddie Van Halen. There have been loads of famous people recently dying. Have you noticed or is it just me?

Did you ever see the Twilight Zone episode about the man who shows up and gives a box with a button on it to Sum Yung Guy and his wife, Melonie-san? Every time the button is pushed, $5000 is transferred into Mr. Guy's bank account and somewhere in the world a stranger drops dead. The man leaves the box with a promise to return and retrieve it the next day. Husband and wife begin to debate over whether or not to press the button.

Would you press the button? I hate to think somebody pushed the button on Jerry Jeff.

Women Will Fool You

Women will fool you. They're good at it. They know they have an advantage when it comes to dealing with men and they use it. The strategy comes as naturally for them as a tuna in water. It's the super power of persuasion but that's just a polite way of saying they use their sex appeal to get their way. Of course they do. Wouldn't you if you could?

It takes a little acting ability but a little goes a long way when you have a captive audience. Men want to believe women are attracted to them. Women know this and use it to leverage themselves in conversation and deed. Oh, there are other tools such as the tantrum -- an infantile tactic that surprisingly succeeds more often than not -- or the great hurt and resulting pout with or without tears depending on the depth of faux pain required.

Yet, it's a light touch or a suggestive smile and my sensors are re-calibrated automatically. Did I miss something? Run that back again.

Yep, it's a power game complete with mental leveraging and researched statistics. "Did you know it IS usually the husband or ex-husband who commits abuse? One in two women were abused as children, one in five is being abused as we speak..."

... and my sensibillities are being abused as I am made to kowtow, consider, re-consider, adjust, and squeezed for payment. Better to live on a corner of the roof than with a contentious woman. Yeah, but women will still fool you. 

Some say it was daytime television that began to sever wives' relationships with their husbands. Others say it was feminism; Gloria Steinham and all that. Some even say it was the washing machine that liberated women. I say it was friendly, non-assuming guys like me that allowed it to happen.

Imagine a world where the men go off to work in the morning while the women gather at the river with bundles of laundry.

[Shrugs shoulders] Well, everything goes in cycles -- just like washing machines. Which reminds me, my number should be coming up soon enough. I need to load up my Amazon Wish List.

Tuesday, October 20, 2020

Thursday, October 15, 2020

DMT Book Covers


Remember when there were free book covers for your textbooks and over the course of the semester you wrote your girlfriend's name on it and otherwise doodled all over it? How nice to download a free book cover and wow your friends. Looking at the sample above makes me high and makes me want to follow my spirit guide to someplace with altitude. You know, so I can have a good look around.

Monday, October 5, 2020

Guess Again!

This scene is from what famous movie? I'd give a hint but I figure astute viewers already know the answer, so... I'll tell you this much, the feller in the pic is talking about hunting in the winter with his dog Blue.

Saturday, October 3, 2020

One Step Forward Two Steps Backward

Some days things just don't work out. It's Saturday and I keep bouncing from chore to chore because when I try to accomplish a task something comes up -- either I'm missing the right part or other people won't cooperate. For instance, I went to the lumber yard to purchase four small metal screws whose absence is preventing me from putting up rain gutters. Well, the lumber yard wasn't open. On a Saturday! It's frustrating. I went to visit a neighbor. Guess what? They weren't at home.

So, I'm at home now and I'm thinking it's Saturday and I should relax. Chill. I have a rifle and scope that needs to be sighted-in. I have piles of brush to burn. I need to work on my Cat story. I need to review more audio files for the audio production of Stolen Worlds. I need to begin painting the interior of my new place (I have the paint, brushes and all is ready to go.). I need to build a cabinet for my microwave. I need to research more towards my solar conversion (Yep, I'm going solar.). And on it goes.

But it doesn't feel like I'll get around to any of those things, either. As I focus on this moment and the words that follow, the radio blasts out Men At Work: "Living in the land down under, where the winds blow, then thunder... better run, better take cover..."

I'm hooked on pop music. It just takes one cool song to make me anticipate the next and before long I'll wake up and realize I've sat here for thirty minutes listening to music on the radio. Who needs chores when you're distracted by classic rock? Music distracts me so much that I have to turn it off while I eat my meals. I'm not kidding. I should have been a musician instead of handsome.

Well, the chores will still be there on Monday. Meanwhile, somebody needs to watch the trees swaying in the cool breeze. At dusk, the cats will wake up to go outside to play. Me? I'm just gonna put on my babyface and wait for the next song.